Asking for cash as a Wedding Gift!
Friday, March 13th, 2009Well the great debate runs on: How do you ‘politely’ ask for cash/vouchers for a wedding gift? Well having read umpteen threads on various sites it would appear that many folk think you don’t. So many people comment that it’s impolite to ask for gifts of any kind and apparently in a survey by WeddingChannel.com “42% of brides and grooms-to-be said that “how to request money as a wedding gift” is the most challenging etiquette issue they face as they plan their weddings”… I agree that finding a way to ask may be challenging but I would disagree that so many people today would find it impolite. As I have mentioned in previous posts most of us are happy to know that we are helping towards something that’s wanted or needed. And few of us would dream of attending a wedding or other special occasion without a gift so why should those who are receiving the gift not be able to communicate their likes/dislikes in some way. I for one would be delighted if someone told me exactly what they would like to receive, but I agree, it is not always the easiest thing to deal with or to be able to say “I’d like you to give me this or that!” It’s mostly down to value. You rarely know how much your guest wants to spend and your guest probably doesn’t know himself!
That leads me to what is an acceptable amount to spend as a wedding guest. Obviously it is all about your circumstances and how much you can afford so it’s really not for me or anyone to dictate but as a guide a figure of around £20-£30 is acceptable if you are an evening guest. If you are attending the full wedding then I would perhaps guage it on how close you are to the couple but around £60 is a good place to start, more if it’s really close friends or family. Why not club together with colleagues? Or why not give some Euros or currency for their honeymoon destination? When we got married we had no wedding list but the best gift by far was Portuguese Escudos given to us to spend on whatever we wanted on our honeymoon. Sadly I struggle to remember many of the other gifts we received. So back to the dilemma of giving cash. Rest assured whatever amount you do decide to give it will be so greatly appreciated, far more than a gift for the attic and that should be incentive enough for everyone to stop pussyfooting around!! Get on with it!
Read on for some more polite ways of asking for what you really want.
Your presence on our Wedding Day is far more important than any presents you could give and as such we don’t have a traditional wedding list. However as some of you have asked what we would like we have enclosed some details to assist with this. Having already created a home with all we need we will just be happy to see you on the day and want you to enjoy our wedding so please do not feel obliged to give in any way.
—-
We have invited you to celebrate our wedding day with us and we really do not expect a gift. Some guests however have indicated that they would like to give/buy us something to symbolise the event. We have enclosed a card to assist with this. We have also compiled a small list of items for those who would prefer not to give monetary gifts.
—–
The love of family and friends
Bring happiness that never ends
Each one of you as guests we’ll treasure
You’ll fill our day with so much pleasure
While wedding presents are so nice
Your presence surely will suffice
But if a gift is on your mind
Your contribution would be kind
Bring happiness that never ends
Each one of you as guests we’ll treasure
You’ll fill our day with so much pleasure
While wedding presents are so nice
Your presence surely will suffice
But if a gift is on your mind
Your contribution would be kind
We have a fund, please see below
Each welcome gift will help it grow
But the greatest gift is that you’ll say
You’d love to share our wedding day
—-
We are sending out this invitation
And hope you’ll join our celebration
And hope you’ll join our celebration
Our dearest wish is that you’re there to share our special day
So please don’t think that you’re obliged
to give in any way
But if a gift is your intention
We’ll take the opportunity to mention
What most of you already know
We set up home some time ago
But if a gift is your intention
We’ll take the opportunity to mention
What most of you already know
We set up home some time ago
With this in mind we don’t need much
No household things, or gifts as such
We have a fund, please see below
Each welcome gift will help it grow
But most importantly our request
is that you’ll be our wedding guest
But most importantly our request
is that you’ll be our wedding guest
and then at the end of whatever you have selected you can add details of your gift fund:
Our Wedding Fund is registered with 1BigPresent.com
Our unique Occasion Number is —-
—–
As our special day draws near,
we hope our sentiment is clear
Our dearest wish is that you’re there,
and in our happiness you’ll share
Your presence is what matters most,
not gadgets for our tea and toast
But if a gift is on your mind,
A small contribution would be kind
We have a fund, please see below
Each welcome gift will help it grow.
So ‘Thank you’ is all that’s left to say
We’ll see you on our wedding day
we hope our sentiment is clear
Our dearest wish is that you’re there,
and in our happiness you’ll share
Your presence is what matters most,
not gadgets for our tea and toast
But if a gift is on your mind,
A small contribution would be kind
We have a fund, please see below
Each welcome gift will help it grow.
So ‘Thank you’ is all that’s left to say
We’ll see you on our wedding day
Our Gift Fund is registered with 1BigPresent.com
Our unique occasion number is —–
Our unique occasion number is —–
—-
The love of family and friends
a precious gift that never ends
Each one of you as guests we’ll treasure
You’ll bring our special day such pleasure
And though wedding gifts are oh so nice
Your presence surely will suffice
But if a gift is on your mind
Your contribution would be kind
We have a fund, please see below
Each welcome gift will help it grow
Though more than this we hope you’ll say
You’ll be there on our wedding day
a precious gift that never ends
Each one of you as guests we’ll treasure
You’ll bring our special day such pleasure
And though wedding gifts are oh so nice
Your presence surely will suffice
But if a gift is on your mind
Your contribution would be kind
We have a fund, please see below
Each welcome gift will help it grow
Though more than this we hope you’ll say
You’ll be there on our wedding day
—-
We are sending out this invitation
And hope you’ll join our celebration
Our dearest wish is that you’re there
to share our special day,
So please don’t feel obliged
to give in any way
But if a gift is your intention
We’ll take this opportunity to mention
What most of you already know,
We set up home some time ago
With this in mind we don’t need much
No household things, or gifts as such
We have a fund, please see below
Each welcome gift will help it grow
But more importantly our request
is that you’ll be our wedding guest
Our dearest wish is that you’re there
to share our special day,
So please don’t feel obliged
to give in any way
But if a gift is your intention
We’ll take this opportunity to mention
What most of you already know,
We set up home some time ago
With this in mind we don’t need much
No household things, or gifts as such
We have a fund, please see below
Each welcome gift will help it grow
But more importantly our request
is that you’ll be our wedding guest
and then at the end of whatever you have selected you can add:
Our Wedding Fund is registered with 1BigPresent.com
Our unique Occasion Number is —-
Our unique Occasion Number is —-
—-
As our special day draws near,
we hope our sentiment is clear
Our dearest wish is that you’re there,
and in our happiness you’ll share
Your presence is what matters most,
not gadgets for our tea and toast
But if a gift is on your mind,
A small contribution would be kind
We’re planning for our life ahead
and things we’ll need as we are wed
Each little gift from you we’ll treasure,
but value we will never measure
So ‘thank you’ is all that’s left to say
We’ll see you on our wedding day
we hope our sentiment is clear
Our dearest wish is that you’re there,
and in our happiness you’ll share
Your presence is what matters most,
not gadgets for our tea and toast
But if a gift is on your mind,
A small contribution would be kind
We’re planning for our life ahead
and things we’ll need as we are wed
Each little gift from you we’ll treasure,
but value we will never measure
So ‘thank you’ is all that’s left to say
We’ll see you on our wedding day
—-
As our wedding day draws near
We hope our sentiment is clear
We need you there as we are wed
to witness our love as vows are said
But as for gifts, please, please don’t try
to find the ideal thing to buy
We have no list of pots and pans
just hopes and dreams and honeymoon plans
So if a gift is on your mind
A contribution would be kind
It will help us more than words can say
To celebrate our special day
Thank you
We hope our sentiment is clear
We need you there as we are wed
to witness our love as vows are said
But as for gifts, please, please don’t try
to find the ideal thing to buy
We have no list of pots and pans
just hopes and dreams and honeymoon plans
So if a gift is on your mind
A contribution would be kind
It will help us more than words can say
To celebrate our special day
Thank you
—-
Your presence will be the greatest gift to us at our wedding and we so look forward to spending our special day with you!
As ……. and I are so lucky to have a home together and already own many of the items that we need we have decided not to request wedding gifts. We know however that some of you have been enquiring about this so we would like to say that if it is your intention to mark the occasion of our marriage with a gift then we would be more than grateful to receive a small contribution towards our honeymoon/new kitchen/new furniture etc. More than anything we hope that you can make it on the day so please, please don’t feel obliged to give in any way.
As ……. and I are so lucky to have a home together and already own many of the items that we need we have decided not to request wedding gifts. We know however that some of you have been enquiring about this so we would like to say that if it is your intention to mark the occasion of our marriage with a gift then we would be more than grateful to receive a small contribution towards our honeymoon/new kitchen/new furniture etc. More than anything we hope that you can make it on the day so please, please don’t feel obliged to give in any way.